Seniors know they are too old to Trick or Treat when …
Program Titles
- Come Visit Gramma
- I Don’t Remember Her Growing Old
- When A Mother Blows Out 80 Candles
- Laugh out loud
- Family life
Alice Collins, defrosts chicken, has hot flashes, misplaces her glasses and celebrates family life in her columns and books.
She is also a family life speaker and has been a contributing author to the “Chicken Soup For The Soul” series of books five times.
Seniors know they are too old to Trick or Treat when …
They get winded from knocking on the door.
They have to have kids chew the candy for them.
They ask for high fiber, sugar-free treats.
When someone drops treats in their goody bags, they lose their balance and fall over.
People say, “Great Boris Karloff Mask!”
BUT they’re not wearing a mask.
When the door opens Seniors yell,
“Trick or…..” and can’t remember the rest.
They have to carefully choose costumes that won’t dislodge their hairpieces.
Grandpa is the only Power Ranger in the neighborhood with a walker.
They can’t out run the neighbors’ dogs.
They lose their dentures in taffy apples.
A little love holds Gramma’s hand, looks over her home made costume and announces,
“I love you as Gramma best!”
They have to drive home before dark.
Papa’s costume prop, a baby bottle, contains Jim Beam.
Aunt Blue Belle thinks she’s a fairy godmother.
Today she is.
Their companions, ART ‘n RITIS, hobble along with them.
They receive much joy when they secretly sprinkle pennies in the front yards of neighborhood children.
From many Halloweens ago, they recall their children’s rhyme;
“Trick or Treat, Smell my feet,
Give me something good to eat.”
Books by Alice Collins
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